Orgasmic Mastery — A Course for Men
Week 3: Conscious Breathing
- On containers and commitments
- Breath as a tool towards orgasmic mastery
- Conscious Breathing
- Erotic-Self Exploration #2
- More PC muscle exercises
On perceptions of success and failure:
Please login or register for Orgasmic Mastery to view this content.How did your erotic self-exploration go? Perhaps it went well, perhaps not. Perhaps you feel like you failed. Even if you tell yourself you failed, you succeeded as long as you engaged in the process, as long as you took a step on this journey. When you go on a journey, you encounter setbacks; that’s part of the process. Part of the dance is to take steps forward and steps backward. The role of the coach is to say, “Let’s start moving forward again, let’s recalibrate and keep moving.” Having those stumbles is part of the journey.
Please login or register for Orgasmic Mastery to view this content.Revisiting the topic of commitment, ask yourself: What container do you need to fully commit to this exploration? Make commitments and keep them. It’s better to make small commitments you keep than big ones you break. Strengthen your integrity.
Breath as a tool towards orgasmic mastery
Please login or register for Orgasmic Mastery to view this content.Breathing is directly correlated to your experience with your level of arousal and ejaculation and orgasm. Consciously controlling your breath can help you gain conscious control over ejaculation. Your breath is inextricably tied up in your physical and emotional states. When you’re happy, you are breathing in one way; when you are sad your breathing patterns are a different way; when you are excited you breathe in another way; when you are depressed you breathe in yet another way.
Likewise, as you move through your levels of arousal and ascend the arousal staircase, your breathing patterns tend to change. As people get closer to orgasm they tend to clench their muscles and breathe more shallowly and rapidly, or they hold their breath. This is helpful is if you want to come; it localizes your energy buildup in your genitals. Simply by altering the depth and speed of your breath, you can increase or decrease your level of arousal. For example, if you are at a level 5 and you want to increase to your 6 or 7, you can intentionally increase the speed and shallowness of your breath. Likewise, if you are moving higher on the staircase than you want, in other words you are moving toward the point of no return and would like to come down, one way to bring your arousal down or make it more manageable is to simply slow down your breath and deepen it.
On breathing into your belly:
Use slow and deep breathing into your belly, not just your chest; this helps keep the body relaxed and the mind still. In yogic practice, they teach the triangle breath, which involves inhaling to a count of 5, holding for 5, and exhaling for 5. As you’re breathing slowly in for a count of 5, visualize a light coming up one side of the triangle; as you hold, visualize light going across the top of the triangle; and as you exhale, visualize the light flowing down the other side. This is one way to learn relaxation and ejaculatory control.
Be aware of how energy is tied into your breath. If you want to have some excited quick upward movement in that energy, you might want to do a lot of rapid movement. Or you can experiment with slow energy movement. Integrate your breath with your speed and type of movement.
Week 3 Homework:
Please login or register for Orgasmic Mastery to view this content.Sit in a chair in an upright posture with your feet planted firmly on the ground. Adjust your posture and make an effort to ensure that all your vertebrae are in vertical alignment. Close your eyes and bring your attention into your body, into what you are feeling right now. Notice places where you feel tension; notice places where you feel relaxed. Feel the ground underneath your feet. You can push down with your feet, pressing into the ground just to gain increased awareness for the moment. Then release the pressure, maintaining that feeling. Now bring your attention into your breath. Notice each inhale, and notice each exhale. Notice if you are breathing into your chest or into your belly. Notice if you are breathing rapidly, or if you are breathing slowly. Notice if you are breathing shallowly, or if you are breathing deeply. And now simply take your breath deeper into your belly, more slowly and more deeply. With each successive inhale, take it slower and deeper into your belly.
This part alone can be a challenge for some people. If you have a long-standing habit of breathing shallowly, rapidly, and just into your chest this adjustment may take some effort and time. Give it that effort. Doing this alone may spark dramatic changes in your sexual response. Make each breath slower and deeper, down into your belly. Anytime you notice that your awareness is back into your head, just refocus your attention. Come back to each breath, back to each inhale, and back to each exhale. How slow can you take each breath? How deeply can you take your breath until you are taking the slowest, deepest breaths that you have ever taken in your entire life?
For Further Breath Exploration:
Check out: www.DoAsOne.com
Enjoy the Universal Breathing Room, and practice slow, deep breathing along with others around the world (and in this group). I am getting into the practice of loading the page, and keeping it in the background with my speakers on, so that I can breathe along with it while I do my work. This can be a great way to retrain your body into making deep breathing your normal habit and pattern.
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Once again, set a timer for 30 minutes. Again the focus is going to be on the gourmet meal, not a fast food experience. Take your time and wake up your whole body. As before, from this point on be aware of your arousal staircase and where you are on it at all times. Find out what makes your 1 different from your 2, your 2 different from your 3, and so on, all the way up to what makes your 9 different from your 10?
However, this time as you start to get aroused, be aware of your breathing. Don’t change anything at first, simply notice it. Notice your normal way of breathing. As you progress and start to get to your number 8, consciously alter your breathing. Allow your breathing to slow and deepen as we did in the Conscious Breathing exercise. When you do this, notice what changes in your arousal level. You may notice that your arousal drops or stops ascending as quickly. Slow down that breathing even more and just keep noticing what happens as you do so.
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Continue exploring your PC muscles. As we’ve discussed previously, having a strong PC muscle is key to becoming multi-orgasmic. This week, move up to 75 rapid squeeze-release repetitions, twice each day. Also do 20 slow squeeze-hold-release exercises. Be sure your release is just as slow and controlled as your inward squeezes.
Partner Exercise:
Sit across from one another (yab yum position works great)
Sink into a rhythm of matching each other’s breaths. One person can lead, with the other following. With each successive breath, take the inhale slower and deeper into your belly. Keep the breath relaxed. Slow and deep. Maintain this breath together.
Maintain this for at least a few minutes. Move into your sex play together from here. As you do, keep an awareness of matching your breath together — slow and deep, long and relaxed on the exhale.
How does this impact your sexual experience together?