In, “Dataclysm: Who We Are (When We Think No One Is Looking),” Christian Rudder, co-founder of the OK Cupid dating website used user data to gather fascinating facts about modern romance.
OK TO MAKE MORE CONNECTIONS
The average length of a message has declined by two thirds to about 100 words. Perhaps because dating has become more “transactional” in light of the 140 character Twitter meme and apps like Tinder.
What this tells me is that you can reach out to more people and make more connections than you might be making now, literally shuffling through potential dates like you shuffle a deck of cards.
MONTANA LIKES TO HOOK UP
Montana and North Dakota have the highest percentage of people who are looking for sex, not love, on OK Cupid. Again, the trend is toward more sexual partners than in the past. And I’m a proponent of having many positive, conscious, connected sex experiences if, and only if you get regularly tested and use condoms and other safe sex practices.
You don’t have to have INTERCOURSE with every person you date. It’s enough to start with kissing and fondling. That way you can make sure you establish your sexual history, share your recent STD test results and ease into getting to know a person.
When you ask to see their STD tests, if they cannot produce them, don’t sleep with them. If you still want to have sex with them in a week, that will give them time to get tested.
Make sure you READ the results of the tests. You don’t want to get herpes or such if you don’t have them!
Another datapoint I found interesting was the age of attraction:
Women’s age vs. the age of men she’s most attracted to climbed as women got older, while men’s did not. Men consistently want to date young women in their twenties even when they are twice as old:
Women’s Age Preference:
20 wants 23
25 wants 26
30 wants 30
40 wants 38
Men’s Age Preference:
20 wants 20
25 wants 21
30 wants 20
40 wants 21
Why do men want to date women half their age?
It’s a biological imperative. Fecundity… ripeness… ability to bear children. Men are driven to want to plant their seed in the most fertile womb.
You can’t fault men for wanting to date younger women. It’s a primal drive.
If you want to know more about the science behind the perfect profile, check out Dataclysm.
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Secrets To The Way We Date,
Sloane