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Relationship Values: Your Needs and Her Needs

Note Reminder for Success

Give this a few minutes thought today:

When you are in a relationship, what is it YOU want?

What are your needs?

Why are you in or why do you want to be in a relationship instead of being single or dating?

What are you hoping to “get out of it?”

(If you are not sure how to answer, I have just the thing to help you. Read on.)

Now, imagine how every single person in the world answers that question differently…

And imagine that your answers today are very different than they would have been ten years ago, even one year ago.

Our needs change. We mature. We accomplish.

We have new hungers and desires.

Knowing WHAT you want from your relationship right now is the first step in getting more of it.

Knowing what your partner wants is the second step to co-creating a partnership where each is extraordinarily motivated to give the other what they uniquely desire.

That’s amore!

Once you begin getting up everyday and giving your partner what they want and them giving you what you want ― it begins to make your relationship feel very rewarding, very satisfying.

And really, WHAT could you or your partner ask for that you wouldn’t be willing to give to each other?  Not much.

You are on reading this article because you likely want to give your partner the world on a platter.

So getting clear and honest with yourself and your partner about each others’ needs builds an amazing foundation to heap more love, affection, appreciation, and camaraderie on top.

How do you figure this out? It’s not like you have a “Needs List” typed out and taped to the refrigerator door!

But soon you will. One list for you. One for her.

Here’s how…

One of our tiniest yet mightiest downloadable workbooks is called “Relationship Magic.”

Relationship Magic


To make it easy for you to think about what your needs are, what you most value and desire as the result of being in a relationship, I listed nearly 100 values to make it easy to choose.

Values are things like freedom, security, family focus, faith, humor, passion, honesty…

The workbook is really an “exercise” in thinking about what most makes for a meaningful relationship to you, based on your values.

Every person has a unique set of values. And when you know yours, and your partners, you can focus on giving each other those experiences you want most.

Without knowing your values, all you’re doing is playing guessing games.

Not knowing each other’s relationships values means your satisfaction is hit and miss.

Wouldn’t you rather know? Wouldn’t you rather get your needs met easily?

Remember back to when you were in “the perfect relationship.” In that moment, your needs were getting met.

When you can describe for your partner what it feels like to you when your needs are met, they can focus on doing those things that satisfy you most ― without wasting time on things that don’t move your needle.



A author named Willard F. Harley Jr. wrote a book called “His Needs, Her Needs.” Harley only got it partly right.

He says men have these needs when in a relationship.

His Needs: (in descending order of importance)

1 Sexual Fulfillment
2 Recreational Companionship
3 A Partner Who Takes Care of Her Looks
4 Peace and Quiet In Your Home
5 Admiration From Your Woman

Her Needs:

1 Your Affection
2 Intimate Conversation
3 Honesty, Openness and Trust
4 Financial Security
5 Commitment to Family

This is a generalized list that can help you begin to understand how to fulfill each others needs.

You might have some of Harley’s needs on your list or have an entirely different list of values and needs that work for you.

Each of us desires a uniquely personal set of attributes to feel satisfied, happy and content.

Listen To Me Describe Relationship Values <===Click Here

Click the link above and listen to my description of Relationship Values.  Takes only a few minutes.

Whether you’re married or not, you need to get your needs met and so does your partner.

This is valuable information even if you are dating, because it will show you what potential partners are seeking as they assess your character. And asking for what you need helps them make you happy.

“Meet your lover’s needs as you would want your lover to meet yours.”

Comment from a customer about this:

Good morning my friend;
I thank you so much for your sound and timely advice about a subject that has been dear to my heart ever since I was fourteen years old. I am almost certain that the loss of HEAT in my marital relationship is cause by a lack of intelligent communication on our individual parts.

As a highly educated and sexually liberated woman, you already know the ambivalence of conflicting desires will definitely interfere with the free flow of healthy sexual vibrations. I have been aware of this for a very long time. Finally, I will take and use or practice what you have practiced and, are teaching. I am also very much aware of the importance of passion and sexual expression in a relationship.  I have always known that the absence of juicy sex in a relationship will result in small and petty situations being blown out of proportions. I will take the time, today, to absorb more of your invaluable information about the sensual side of my life. ― TS

Click here to download your own copy of the Relationship Magic Workbook at my Insider’s Club discount.


Relationship Magic CoupleWith Love,
Susan Bratton

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