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I was pissed..

Fiery Displeasure: Pissed-Off and Expressive

I was pissed.

Really mad – monumentally irked – at someone.

And it’s very unlike me to be mad at anyone for long.

I was struggling to “get over it” for days.

I went to Chas August*, the relationship counselor I recommend to those of you guys who need more one-on-one than I can provide and here’s what Chas told me:

(and this got me to thinking about YOUR sex life.)

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“Your anger is just your way of controlling your sadness.”

Each time you get sad, instead of feeling it, you push the sad sensations and thoughts away and use anger to supplant the pain and fear of sadness.

Geez.

OK

Uncle!

I am now proactively feeling my sadness now, and I’ve cried for two days straight. And I’m starting to feel much better.

That’s when I realized…

If YOU are pissed about your sex life, maybe it’s because you would feel overwhelmed by sadness at the longing for intimate connection, if you didn’t cover it over with anger.

Would the sadness be unbearable?

No.

You could handle it.

But it ain’t pretty to feel like crap. (pardon)

But it’s better than being perpetually pissed.

And it’s truthful.

If you said to a woman, “I’m really feeling sad about my sex life. I want more. More intimacy, playfulness, affection, and touch – I definitely want to give and receive more touch.

And what I’m doing isn’t working and I feel disconnected.

Would being that honest with a woman touch her?

Would that level of truthfulness open her heart to you?

You know it would. Because it’s pure.

Pure truth is intoxicating.

There is no fear where love exists.

Don’t be afraid to ask your woman to be open to love and connection from you.

If she’s not open to you, you’ll have a decision to make.

But chances are, if you reveal yourself from a place of wanting to give and receive love, even if she’s not able to love you, you’ll know what to do next on your journey toward more love.

Just please don’t accept a life of anger, instead of love.

P.S. If you need someone to talk to, Chas August gives my members and followers a free 30 minute Skype call to see if he can help you. Chas is who Tim and I go to when we need clarity and sage advice. If you are struggling, with anger, upset or disconnection, contact Chas and mention me.

[email protected]

With love,
Susan Bratton

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