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Rough Sex Pain Fix [Mailbag]

Rough Sex Pain Fix [Mailbag]

Shane and Carolyn are in their 30’s, engaged to be married but not able to have sex. They broke her vagina. 😭

I have a remediation plan for her to fix her broken vagina. It includes three steps that range from free to cheap to luxury. And I have an interim sex plan for this couple to have super hot sex while she recuperates.

“We want to get back to our INCREDIBLE and fun sex life!”

3 Steps to Fix A Broken Vagina 

A year ago, they had rough sex. It traumatized Carolyn, and she was unable to relax and enjoy intercourse any longer.

She says, “We want to get back to our INCREDIBLE and fun sex life! ”

“Long story short, we had VERY rough sex that night. All kinds of sex, lol. I had about nine orgasms. Back a year later, I’m still not feeling sensation internally in my hoo-ha (vajayjay as you say). 

What I feel now is:

  • Clitoral sensation is the same.
  • Internal vaginal feeling is gone. It feels more like pressure without pleasure. I even feel a significant discomfort when we have sex. And after a year, I find myself not interested in sex at all. Now it’s a physical and mental block. 
  • when we do have sex, we notice a ridge or something different internally. Shane and I both feel it. Like a “clicking.”

The clicking and ridge: we never felt it before that night. Penetration would feel smooth going in and out, but we feel one spot that seems like a little ridge of some sort since then. While going in and out, there’s a spot that causes a disruption, not smooth. At that point, it feels like clicking.

The discomfort: most times, it just feels like pressure without pleasure. Like numbness. Sometimes, very seldom, he will hit what seems to be the “g spot,” and I can orgasm. But it’s rare, like 9/10 times. We have to CONSTANTLY change positions because he hits spots internally that cause me some discomfort or pain. I never felt this before. I often feel like I endure the pain and discomfort until he cums, so we both don’t go without it.

I still have a sex drive but no desire for penetrating sex. I want that desire back.”

OK, here’s what I want you to do.


This assessment will allow you to see whether there’s a blood flow issue, a nerve issue, direct damage to a specific tissue, or a combination.

First, I want you to lie down very comfortably in bed with your legs open in a butterfly position supported by pillows under them and a towel underneath you.

Then, have Shane sit perpendicular to you so that he can get right down with his eyes on your Yoni (vulva) and see what he’s doing. Make sure he is as comfortable as you are. If he wants back support, provide that.

Have him wear cotton pants and a shirt. Get the oil laid out on a towel and have an extra hand towel to wipe the oil off. Put towels under you to catch any oil. Have a notepad and paper or record your conversation. Later, make a list of where the pain points are.


Next, have him coat his hands in organic avocado oil or sweet almond oil. When he applies the oil, have him do it like he’s washing his hands with soap. Have him put the oil everywhere on the backs of his hands, across his fingers, and on the top and bottom. Thoroughly coat his hands with oil and apply it all over your vulva in a thin layer. He will need to reapply the oil at your request.

You don’t want it too slippery, because you won’t feel his touch. But you don’t want it to feel dry, because that won’t feel good either.

The tried and true oil I recommend (and I’ve tried them ALL) is here in my Amazon store:

Hobe Avocado Oil and Vita Organic Sweet Almond Oil Brands That Suz Recommends

Then, I want your partner to do a pain and sensation assessment of your entire vulva and vagina using your feedback.

Use a 1-10 scale for how much sensation and pain you experience when he touches the various spots.

As he touches each spot, he tells you where he is. This helps you connect neural sensations.

For example, he will say things like: “This is your mons venus above your clitoral hood. This is the left side of the shaft of your clitoris down near the root. This is the left side of your clitoral shaft, almost near the tip (glans). This is one knuckle inside your vagina at 6 o’clock. This is where your labia join together at the bottom of your vulva (your fourchette).”

Each time he touches an area, give him the 1-10 Pain and Sensation metric.

Study this drawing to learn the names before you start. It would help if you use a mirror and touch each of the parts and point them out. In this way, you both will agree on what is down there.


As he touches each area, give him feedback on sensation and pain from 1-10, with one being the least, ten being the most.

I want him to first start with your mons and touch across the top of it.

Then I want him to touch the clitoral hood very lightly so you can feel that area.

Next, I want them to locate the clitoral head and touch all around it. Have him touch the tip, very lightly. Touch the right side and left side. Touch the shaft of your clitoris on the top, bottom, left, and right. Touch the root deep inside your body as far as he can feel.

At all times, the top of your clitoris is 12 o’clock on the face of the clock. The bottom is at 6 o’clock. Your left is 3 o’clock, and your right is 9 o’clock. This is tuned to him, facing you looking at your body. When he goes inside to map the interior of your vaginal canal, you will use the same clock reference and use one, two, or three knuckles deep, or a full finger in.

As an example, you could end up identifying the wounded area as, “My pain is an 8 in intensity at 4 o’clock, two and a half knuckles in my vagina.”


Continuing, I want him to touch each of the inner labia. Run his fingers along the edges as well as squeeze the butterfly wings. Report the pain/sensation.

From there, I want him to palpate the outer labia — those are the big lips covered in pubic hair. Have him press down across all of the outer labia. Note any places that hurt. Note any feelings of tissue damage. Sometimes there is a “stitch” in the tissue — it feels stuck and knotted up. Note these issues, if any.

I want him to touch the bottom, the fourchette, where the labia come together near the perineum.

Then, I want to touch the perineal area and see if there are any sensitivities there.

Take a break. Remember to breathe. Have some water. Tell the other you love them.

Let him wipe off his hands and take notes, or you can record the conversation while you’re doing the inventory and transcribe it afterward.

When you’re ready and feel comfortable, have him reapply a whole new batch of oil all over his hands.

I want him to touch the slit or opening of your vagina from top to bottom. When he touches the slit, I want to feel just under the clitoris on the face of your open vulva, right where your urethral exit is. This is where your pee comes out. Circle the opening of your urethra and note any pain and sensation.

Next, he will travel down to the opening to the vaginal entrance. This entrance is a sphincter—a rounded muscle. It’s called the introitus. Map the sphincter all the way around like a clock—12 o’clock, 1 o’clock 2, etc. to see if there are any wounded areas. Feel around it delicately. Are there any torn areas, pain, loss of sensation, or does it feel good and whole?

When you’re ready, let him know he may enter you with his finger.

Make sure he enters you very, very slowly. He’ll go one-finger joint all the way around. Start at 12. Map it all the way around and go two knuckles in, reapplying oil as required. Map it all the way around with his full finger inside and go in as deeply as is comfortable for you. Have him locate your cervix and feel around it for damage. Have him press down in the back of your vagina almost behind the cervix down near your tailbone too.

Notice every sensation and report it to him.

Once you’ve done that first assessment, have him just give you a nurturing, loving vulva massage. In his mind, his goal is “blood flow.” You want to get a lot of blood into your vulva and vagina.

Guide him to giving you a massage that will calm down your nervous system. You’ve been entered and felt in a way you may have never experienced before.

After the calming massage, if you’re up for it, have him go back and touch all the places that hurt. Focus on blood flow and engorgement. Are your outer lips puffier? Are your little labial lips more full of blood and darker in color?

Do the locations where you identified pain feel any better with this extra blood flow from the nurturing massage? Worse? The same?

How is your emotional trauma response? Did this make you feel more worried or more opened?

This second round of touch will allow you to see if there’s blood flow, nerve issue, or direct damage to a specific tissue or a combination.


“Shane and I were able to pinpoint the pain on my left side, mostly internal. I went to the OBGYN, who discovered that same pain point deep in my upper left side of my vaginal canal. Near my ovaries. No signs of scar tissue or damage. She recommended an ultrasound and pelvic physical therapy. Unfortunately, my insurance does not cover any treatments.

Shane and I did realize I have an immense mental block/conditioning with sex now. When he approaches me, it triggers a negative effect rather than desire. If you have any recommendations, I am ready and willing to give it my all. We want our sexy back! Lol !

The vaginal massage was good. I was not able to relax when he massaged the left outer and especially the inner vaginal canal. It was very uncomfortable. The other areas went well. I was missing the pleasure aspect internally. The clitoris has sensation, so that is good.

Internally: overall, the sensation was 0-2; the discomfort was mostly on the left side with a higher pain point in the upper left side.

I mostly just feel “pressure” now internally, without the sensation. (I used to experience high levels of sensations.)”


I have a remediation plan for you to fix your broken vagina. It includes three options that go from free to inexpensive to luxury. And I also have an interim sex plan so that you can have super hot sex while recuperating.

But first, I want to congratulate you on doing the assessment. It takes courage to reveal yourself. It takes commitment to sit down and do the evaluation. And I have 110% confidence you can fix your broken vagina and go on to have even better sex than ever.

The big picture is that you and Shane can most likely heal this damage yourselves for free through the power of engorgement and massage. I’m 98% confident that you can heal yourself if you commit to a 2-3X weekly vaginal massage to guide him to rub those deadened and painful spots. Within a matter of a couple of massages, your sensation should improve, and your pain should diminish.

You can accelerate the healing with a VFit at-home vaginal rejuvenation device. This device has red light therapy, warmth, and vibration, all of which will encourage the healing faster in combination with your healing massage plan. Not only that, the VFit is a great pre-foreplay when you’re finally ready for him to enter you because it engorges the upper vaginal canal area where you have considerable damage.

When you use the VFit with his manual healing massage, you will have improved vaginal mucosal lining integrity; increased blood flow, and more pelvic strength. At $500, this is way cheaper than the doctor’s appointments and ultrasounds. All they will do is charge you money for images; they can’t fix it. The fix is in Shane’s loving touch and the VFit.

Click Here VFit Gold Do-It-Yourself Genital Rejuvenation + Joylux Gold App

The VFit Protocol is Here


IF the pain doesn’t significantly resolve after a dozen massages and every-other-day VFit usage for eight weeks, then I’d seriously consider getting an O Shot. The O Shot will introduce concentrated healing from your body’s growth factors into the exact areas of internal and external damage. This will regrow new tissue and heal the injury with pinpoint accuracy. It costs About $1,500.

I have created many videos about the O Shot. I’ve had four O Shots myself. It healed trauma, improved incontinence, and restored my clitoral orgasmic sensation to the intensity I had at 35. And I’m almost 60! O Shots are AMAZING!

This video is with Dr. Robyn Benson and I explaining the O Shot. She is a master at giving women O Shots for all kinds of trauma.


This video is with Dr. Charles Runels, the INVENTOR of the O Shot.


There are many more O Shot videos here if you want to binge.

Interim Hot Sex Plan During Recuperation

While you are doing this remediation project, here’s what I want you to do to keep your sex life hot. I want you to give your vagina and vulva damage a chance to heal by not having intercourse for at least a month, perhaps two. Until there is no pain, don’t introduce Shane’s penis inside you. You have to let your body get over the trauma response in addition to healing the pain.

Instead, I want you to learn how to get yourself off going down on Shane. And I want you to develop your oral orgasmic response. You can learn to have full-body orgasms with his penis in your throat. The Blow Job Secret is that BJ’s make YOU come.

Watch this video to learn more.


Don’t miss my Bavarian Blow Job Barmaid series, including smallmouth BJ’s, deep throating and the gag reflex, blow job sex positions, and how to give the best blow job.

Suz’s BJ Abbondanza

You can come from your mouth and throat, your whole body, your vulva, squirting, and essentially just have the most incredible full-body orgasms by his penis as your instrument of pleasure.

That is a great thing to learn while you’re resting and recuperating your vagina. PLUS, every time you come from your mouth, you still get blood to your vagina to speed the healing.

Once you feel better, you can have Shane get good at giving YOU oral pleasure. Start with the 69 sex position. It’s a FUN one!

Please keep me in the loop on how you two fare. I’m excited about your journey.

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