Greetings, My Dear VIP!
If you’ve been following my work for any duration over the last two decades, you know that our genital anatomy and arousal patterns inform the sex techniques that I create.
Generally:
* Men are quick to get aroused. Women take physically longer.
* Men start horny. Women need seduction and encouragement. This is the difference between spontaneous desire and responsive desire.
Those are big reasons why women don’t initiate sex as often. They need some warming up before they get hot. They are also generally more affected by religious shame and body image issues, which hold them back from asking for sex. They also experience sexual trauma to a greater extent than men.
That’s why women need male sexual leadership to help us move through these obstacles to meet you in bliss.
My three best strategies for getting women to have super satisfying and highly orgasmic sex are:
- Small Offers
- Breast pleasuring and sensual kissing
- Yoni Massage
And the counter-intuitive tactic that nets way more intercourse is NEVER to do these three things to get intercourse.
Let me say it another way.
Giving pleasure selflessly will result in more quantity of mutual pleasure.
The less you try to give to get, the less pressure she feels, which makes her more comfortable being intimate when she wants and passing when she doesn’t.
Because if she can’t pass on escalating to intercourse, she won’t kiss you, let you play with her boobies, or touch her Yoni.
Little story…
Two nights ago, it was late, and we were tired, but I wanted to ride Tim’s cock. Lately, I’ve been loving cowgirl sex positions where I’m on top of him. I was going at it and having orgasm after orgasm after orgasm. Then suddenly, I needed to take a break.
I hopped off him and lay beside him. Then I realized I was done for the night. I needed to go to sleep.
Tim hadn’t ejaculated. For a moment, I felt the embedded “quid pro quo” guilt that I should have more intercourse so he could come. But my training and experience prevailed.
If I force myself to have sex, my body doesn’t want it. It creates grudges that make me want less sex in the future. What makes me want sex more is when I listen to my body, honor it, and tell Tim the truth.
He has learned our sex life is better when I’m enthusiastically engaged instead of obliged out of duty. So I am always honest with him when I am tired, done, or not feeling it. He doesn’t take it personally. He knows he can always masturbate. And that when I am with him, it’s because I WANT him, not because I’m doing my duty—which only pushes us away.
So when you take on making offers, breast pleasuring, and Yoni massaging as joys for YOU in their own right, she feels like she can receive without feeling guilty if it doesn’t arouse her enough to want more. Over time, she will relax and believe she can receive without giving especially when you are chill and in a great mood no matter what happens.
Trust me… just fill up her pleasure bank, and her cup WILL runneth with desire.
Hardly any woman has ever just been able to experience pleasure without strings attached.
To learn how to make “Small Offers That Lead To Yeses,” go to MoreSexMoreOften.com. You’ll discover the four keys to seduction. It’s a framework for successful bedding women.
To learn how to give a fabulous breast massage, go to BreastMassageMasterPlan.com and follow the steps. Surprise her with FORIA’s organic Intimate Breast Oil.
And use
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Use the lube on her Mons and Labia (where the pubic hair is or was) and the awakening oil when you get to her inner labia, clit hood, shaft, glans, and fourchette.
Always start on the outside and get that tissue well engorged/swollen/erect/tumescent (same meanings, different words) before touching her inner areas.
Think about three zones:
- Belly, groin, mons, outer labia, sweet cheeks
- Inner labia, clit hood, shaft, glans, and fourchette
- Vestibule, vaginal portal, vagina
The vestibule is the opening between the inner labia where her clit, urethra, and vaginal opening are. The vaginal portal is called the introital sphincter. Her vagina is a little pocket, not an inside-out penis.
Always a pleasure in 1-2-3 order to slowly warm her up.
Watch my Yoni massage videos on BetterLover.com
Type “massage” into the search box.
Don’t miss my “Passionate Lovemaking Step-by-Step” video there as well.
I’ve included three images here to show the signs of engorgement. The first image is pre-pleasuring. The second two are post-pleasuring.
Notice how much darker all of the vulva is after massaging?
Look at the increased plumpness of the outer labia.
See how the clitoris is bigger, and the shaft hangs down more?
See how the inner labia are thicker, and the edges are darker?
It may be subtle, but this engorgement significantly influences how easy it is to climax and how much more intense and satisfying her orgasms are.
This plumpness is the equivalent of your erection. You don’t feel as much pleasure flaccid, nor does she. And her vulva takes 20 minutes to engorge, whereas your penis takes 2.
She needs you to help her settle, relax, get in her body (and out of her monkey mind), and get engorged.
If you lead her verbally with encouragement and appreciation about how sexy she is and the changes you see her Yoni going through, the Mind Body connection accelerates her turn-on.
In my book, “How To Talk Dirty Without Feeling Weird,” at DirtyTalkBook.com, I explain how to do this and tell you exactly what to say. You can personalize my verbatims to match your personality.
You’ll see her body start undulating and stretching, her labia puffing out, and her vaginal opening loosening. Wait for her to get lubricated for herself, even when you’re adding more FORIA into her vaginal entrance. Her entrance is called the introital sphincter. It’s a round muscle that will loosen as she gets aroused. You’ll feel it contract as she comes and then loosen as she relaxes.
Once you get your fingers inside her, you’ll feel her vagina squeezing your fingers. If you’ve taught her how to squirt, the ejaculations come right after big squeezes and push-outs.
If you want to make any woman squirt, go to FemaleLiquidOrgasm.com
I’ve taught thousands of women to squirt with that process. And the two things on the top of most women’s SexLifeBucketList.com lists are:
- Orgasms During Intercourse
- G-Spot Awakening and Female Ejaculation
Small Offers, Breast pleasuring and sensual kissing, and Yoni Massage are the on-ramps for her to have orgasmic experiences with you. Lack of engorgement and not feeling relaxed are the two biggest obstacles to her not coming from penetration and not squirting. Her mindset is the predominant roadblock. If she thinks she can’t, she won’t.
You hold faith in her ability and encourage her while you engorge her. This will get her on that upward pleasure spiral with you.
Let me know your questions about anything I’ve written here.
And I especially want to hear how your erotic play dates go with these tips.
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All information from Susan Bratton, Personal Life Media, The20, and our collective brands are personal opinions. The statements made within this email/website have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. These statements and the products of this company are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. Always seek consultation from your doctor.
One Response
I enjoy giving my wife multiple orgasms via breast massages, slow caresses, yoni massages, oral and thru intercourse. She’s very, very orgasmic and I’m very lucky…except that she rarely instigates sex, which is ok mostly, but her libido doesn’t match mine. She prefers every couple of weeks and I prefer every few days. She’s 14 years younger, under 50 years old. I believe she’d be happy with just a quick romp, which is fine occasionally. I get great satisfaction from turning her on and she reacts physically and verbally (which is a great turn on for me lol). She just doesn’t react like you and other coaches say women who are well pleasured react; I.e., want to have sex more frequently. As I’ve matured I have become a much better person because of my wife and for my wife. Following so many of your techniques and they all work. But, she doesn’t want more sex with me…I don’t know what to do any longer…please help! I love you for all you do for us mean and women. Please don’t ever stop!