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She Doesn’t Want To Have Sex When She’s Pregnant

She Doesn’t Want To Have Sex When She’s Pregnant

Hi Susan,

My wife is currently pregnant, so combined with her previous lack of
interest in sex and extreme discomfort, she doesn’t want to have sex at all.
Now this I can understand, given her state, and I have not complained a bit,
despite the fact that I have heard from some that sex is actually
*better*when you are pregnant.

Any suggestions beyond just, “buy my materials”? I thought about it but my
situation seems somewhat different from most of the people you appear to be


Hi J,
Thanks for writing to me. I’m glad you did.

I have only been pregnant once and it was before my husband awakened my sexuality and I’m not a doctor, so I can only advise you from a personal perspective. But I found that all the extra blood flow to my genitals definitely made pregnancy sex the best I’d ever had.

Afterward, I wished for that feeling to return. And it did. But not until we discovered Expanded Orgasm, the genital massage technique that allows you to put your woman into an extended, stacked, multi-orgasmic state of deliciousness. (

How to give her expanded orgasms?

Arousal, from a physical level, is heightened by engorgement. When the erectile tissue (there’s a much erectile tissue inside your woman as there is in your penis and scrotum – the clitoris is just the tip of the iceberg) is engorged, from stroking, massaging, grinding up against each other and any other way you can provide pleasurable sensation, it will feel good to her.

Since she’s going to deliver your baby, you might want to start giving her regular genital massages during her pregnancy.

Lay her comfortably on the bed, butterfly her legs open, put pillows underneath her legs to support them, wrap her upper body in a comfy blanket and stroke and knead and play with her lower abdomen, her hip flexor area, the place where her legs and torso meet. Then move in from the outside edges, stroke all up and down from her mons pubens to her sweet little butt cheeks. Then stroke the outer labia for a long time, really getting them loose, wiggly and engorged. Go from above her clitoral hood, all the way down along her forchette to her perineum. Focus a lot of attention on her perineum because that’s going to be stretched during childbirth and you want it loose, engorged and supple.

If she wants more, she’ll start wiggling and straining or asking you to go “inside.” If she doesn’t, just make some long, smoothing motions with the full flat of your hand from her mons pubis all the way down (lots of lube) to her sweet cheeks. Do this 4-6 times, then put light, even pressure on your whole hand and palm and lay it down on her whole genital area and just hold it for a few seconds, until she sighs a big sweet sigh and thanks you profusely.
Do this as much as she’d like – daily if possible.

This will serve to engorge her and make her feel really sensual and delicious. She might or might not want penetration from there. If you do this everyday, it’s likely she will enjoy having some orgasms from your fingers, your tongue and perhaps… your penis.

Now, as far as Revive Her Drive. If your wife has a “previous lack of interest in sex,” I’d suggest you start devouring the program immediately. If you haven’t gotten your sex life on an upward spiral before you’re having children, it’s likely only going to get more dissatisfying, more sporadic as her world is consumed by kids.

J, you have to get this handled man. And you can start now, by learning the 4 Elements that it takes to have a great sex life. These can all be started while she’s pregnant and amped up over time.

If you have any questions at all about what I’ve written above, just ask.

And congratulations on your coming baby!  Yay! Kids are super awesome and can really deepen your connection to your woman.

With Love,
Susan Bratton

P.S. If you don’t know what some of these terms are, you can use the search box on the upper right hand corner of this page to see illustrations on other blog posts.


  1. Susan,
    I appreciate this message a lot! Especially, the sensitive way you offer such specific physiological information. I find myself at ease and empowered to more fully “own” my desire to pleasure my wife.
    Thank you! – David

  2. thank you

  3. Hi Susan. My wife is pregnant., So I ate the night mode to bring his water to see if it is faulty. Thank you

  4. Hello. Susan – because once you have them every night that forced me to converse with him from behind, you do good or bad way, I’m not. Thank you! / / /

    • Care to translate this comment? ?It has a start (“Hello”)and a finish (“Thank You”)- but makes no sence in between!

  5. My present wife used her sex to snare me even though I was
    married. I was always with lack of knowledge of women ,like many guys.What a ride to hell. My first wife died of a broken heart when she found out. (brain cancer). Everything was hot before “I do” but went down hill after honeymoon. Now the excuse is that she has lung cancer after 30 years of smoking. She turned me down 100’s of time. I know now you just don’t ask for sex but that was okay with my first wife. How do I break up with someone who agreed to contract sex. Once week with no children, jobs or no other impediment. Maybe I am too small 5 1/4 and not too thick. I am in proportion 5’7”. My daughter thinks I am nuts to stay and in therapy for me not the marriage as she won’t go.
    I am reading” Shut up, Stop whining and Get a life. Did Imention I am 84 and married 12 years. Pray for me!

    • Bret,
      This is a very sad story and I wonder if there’s anything you can do to help yourself focus less on victimhood and more on finding compromises or solutions that could make both you and your wife happy? Have you considered starting again with the first of the four elements of sex life revival from Revive Her Drive? The first element of reviving your sex life is to go all the way back to romancing your wife again so she wants you like she used to. No wife wants to have sex with a grumpy, pissed of husband out of duty.
      Rebuild your connection, forget the past, and see if you can spend the next ten years in love… the sex will come.

    • Bret, for crying out loud, your wife has lung cancer and is facing the possibilty of dying. Thats going to dampen anyone’s ardour. Susan’s right, stop focussing on your needs and woo her back. Be the man, romance her, care fir her and in doing so the love (and sex) will return. Doesn’t sound like that’s what you really want though.

  6. Nice piece worth trying Suz. Thanx a million.

  7. Never mind with pregnancy up to 6 month but you can try a little bit or many ways of Huck up with forces!

  8. Sex with and for a pregnant woman can be very good and exciting up to the final month in normal situations. This includes penetration. I recommend you stand by the side of the bed when you penetrate her. That way you are not putting pressure on top of her stomach and she can lay in a comfortable position. The last month you will need to just give her pussy massages for two reasons. One penetration may put too much pressure on the baby as it lowers into the birthing position and second you want to keep massaging her pussy so she keeps alive sexually for after the birth of your child. If you do this hopefully she will take care of you orally. This will also keep her sexually involved and she may even learn that she can have a orgasm through this means.

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